Saturday 9 December 2017

Wedding Traditions I'm NOT Following...

The concept of wedding traditions can be a little odd. We so often associate weddings with big white dresses, but white dresses did not come to be heavily associated with weddings until about 1840. Prior to that, you'd wear whatever colour or garments were accessible. We so often associate
weddings with tradition, but sometimes I feel like a lot of these traditions perpetuate the idea of having to spend additional money on your wedding and that simply doesn't work for me. So below, I'm going to discuss some of the wedding traditions that my partner and I will not be following for our wedding next year.

Hiring a fancy car for the journey to the venue

Firstly, this doesn't work for us on a personal level because we will both be going to the venue with our families to get ready there on the morning of our weddings. It seems the most stress-free option. No getting into traffic! No running late! Less of a chance of something splattering on your white dress on the way to the venue! The other reason I'm not particularly fussed about it is that, typically, none of your guests see you arrive in the car. You might utilise it for some pre-ceremony photos, but other than that it's almost a glorified taxi ride.

The Garter Hunt

I don't know about you, but I have a very sweet and very Christian Granny and the idea of my partner vanishing up my skirt in front of all our wedding guests just seems a bit much. I'm not certain Granny would appreciate the spectacle... Personally, I doubt I'd even wear a garter in the first place.



Concealed with a Veil

Apparently in Ancient Greek/Roman culture, bridal veils were worn as it was thought that the veil would protect brides from evil spirits. In other cultures, it works more in arranged marriages where the veil is lifted to allow the groom a proper look at the person they're marrying. For me, my partner has been looking at my ugly mug for almost eight years. I may wear a veil, but I don't see the need for one that covers my face. Also, I'm naturally quite clumsy and a veil covering my face will probably end up with me walking into something which would somewhat ruin my dramatic walk down the aisle.

Three Course Sit Down Meal

So, I've been to weddings with the three course sit down meal. It's very formal and definitely seems to be the 'done thing' at such events. However, I have two reasons why we won't be doing this at our wedding. The first reason is that it's quite expensive to do pre-meal nibbles and canapés AND a three course meal AND wedding cake AND an evening meal/buffet for the guests AND all the champagne/cocktails/drinks in between. For us, we're going to have the canapés in place of a starter and the wedding cake in place of a dessert. Suddenly, the main meal part will simply be a main meal. Catering can be one of the most expensive parts of the day, especially if you have big families or a lot of guests in attendance - suddenly you'll see costs rise substantially. My partner and I started to get sad thinking of how we'd have to cut our guest list down simply because the price of food was going to be so high. In the end, we decided to cut costs by altering the overall meal plan thus allowing us to have more guests - the more the merrier! In the evening, we're going to be getting some food trucks to come down so guests can simply pick out their own meals and it gives people some variety. 
YOU sit on the left, YOU sit on the right.

So it was once traditional that the families of the bride and groom would sit on opposite sides of the venue. However, it is becoming more and more popular to just allow people to sit where they want. Some people have bigger families and therefore more guests. There may be family rifts where it's best to keep space between people on your big day. I personally prefer the idea that people can sit where they want. It continues the laid back vibe we want for our wedding. It also joins the two families together. After all, isn't that the point of a wedding? 

Hiring a Wedding Planner

Some people have busy lives and want to make their nuptials as smooth and stress free as possible. For me, it's OUR day. It'll be OUR decisions. It makes sense to me that we're the ones calling the shots and orchestrating the event. We are doing a lot of DIY bits for our wedding. Why should the planning be any different? I can see why some people would want a wedding planner but personally I always like to feel in control. We've only got a few months to go and our little laid back wedding doesn't feel like a wedding planner is really needed. 

The Father Giving The Daughter Away

For some, this is a really sweet and traditional moment in the ceremony known as the father 'giving away' his daughter to the person they are marrying. I know this is one that some people really like but I don't enjoy the idea of being 'given' to anyone. My parents have known my fiancée for almost 8 years now and the notion of a patriarch handing me over seems odd. Instead, my partner and I will both walk down the aisle with both of our parents either side and our siblings walking down just before us. I prefer this because both of my parents should rightly be by my side in one of the biggest moments of my life. 

The Groom

I mean, just on a personal note, mine is a groomless wedding so there's that... (My bride-to-be told me to suggest this final point. Thanks, darling) 


There may be other things that I'm personally not going to be doing, but so far, these are the ones we've put aside at this stage of our planning. Please come back in the future as I blog my way through the wedding process in the run up to our July 2018 wedding. 

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