How To Know If They're "The One": Halloween Edition

There are points in our relationships that solidify one humble and solitary truth: this is the person that I am meant to be with.

It's not something we always realise instantly. It often takes a foundation of love, trust and respect. Along the way there are several important discussions. We discuss our responsibilities within the relationship. We discuss whether or not we want marriage. We discuss whether or not we want to have children. Once we know that we're on the same page as the person we've chosen to share our life with, it feels like a bridge has been crossed and we're now on the same page and we can peacefully continue our relationship. There is, however, one crucial discussion that all couples need but somehow forget. Once this all important conversation has arisen and been thoroughly discussed in depth it will reveal whether or not you and your partner are compatible...

This conversation in particular is, of course, the ever crucial zombie apocalypse survival discussion.

Yes.

How do you know if you and your sweetheart are meant to be if you don't know your plan for when the undead begin to walk the Earth?
I mean surely the conversation starts with where you in the event of a rage virus outbreak. Do you move into your home together? Do you move into their apartment? How much clothing do you pack? If you live together do you stay there in that home or move elsewhere? Should you fix that slick crack in the window now to prevent zombie breakage later? Which side of the bed do you sleep on and under which pillow do you hide a handy axe?

You then have to discuss the rights and responsibilities of the situation. Who takes on the role of zombie lookout? Who is better at firing a gun? Is your shared home/location big enough for a large supply of weaponry and long-lasting canned goods? You need to discuss your tactics because no one wants to be slowed down by a partner with lousy survival tactics that will ultimately land them, and possibly yourself, in the position of becoming zombie food.

Then we come to the most crucial part of the discussion: what happens if one of you becomes infected. If you're truly in love there should be a pang of sadness in your heart at the very idea of your beloved becoming a member of the living dead but it's also a good idea to discuss what you do in the situation. Anyone who has watched a zombie film probably knows that gut-wrenching moment when the realisation hits: there isn't much time and this person is infected and soon to turn into a zombie. You have to take action and you need to do so very quickly. Now there are two really good options. The first is that you agree to do the humane thing for you both and you kill your partner so there's one less zombie in the world and you at least have a higher chance or survival. The second, and arguably more romantic route, is to stay by the side of your darling and become their food source and hopefully become infected with the same virus. This way you can continue your life together as you run around eating all the humans and causing general global terror but hey - at least you're doing it together!

If you both have a coherent zombie apocalypse survival plan and can agree on tactics and life-saving decisions, you're sorted because if you've got your relationship planned from this point until the dawn of the zombie apocalypse, you know you're set for life. Don't forget: a couple that slays together stays together.

31 Horror Films in 31 Days Challenge: Film Twenty Four: Survival Of The Dead (2009)

So for film 24 in the challenge I've sat down to watch Survival of the Dead.

Having recently watched Night of the Living Dead, I've learned this film is another instalment of a long list of "Living Dead" films by Romero. This, however, lacks the quaint charm of "Night of the Living Dead" where we can forgive the newness and the innocence of the genre exploring new boundaries. Survival of the Dead is a poor quality flick and the zombies are unbelievable and tacky.

This film is interesting in that characters are keeping their undead relatives "alive" by keeping them in their zombie form until a cure can be found. This, of course, leads to problems. It's a nice idea for zombie films, the idea of holding onto hope of a cure and keeping your loved ones, but it's an awful film.

My partner just said "Ha, so this is a comedy? This is meant to be a joke, right? Yeah... this is a joke."
Says it all, really...

This film is so bad it's good really bad.
I'm glad I survived this movie...

Song of the Day: Dawn of the Dead by Murderdolls

As you all know I watched Dawn of the Dead as part of my 31 Horror Films in 31 Days challenge so this Dawn of the Dead inspired song seemed an obvious choice for yet another Halloween themed song of the day.

Enjoy,

All Hallows Read from Neil Gaiman

Neil Gaiman has suggested an excellent new Halloween custom.
It's a project called "All Hallows Read"
The idea of the project is to give someone a scary book this Halloween.
In doing so we can spread the joy of Halloween themed literature and perhaps highlight the works of lesser known authors. This Halloween have already given away some books by Darren Shan, some Gothic short stories and will give some more. I urge you to do the same. If you don't know much about scary books then check out your local library and see what's available.
Anyway, here's Neil Gaiman to tell you a little bit more about the project.

For more info check out AllHallowsRead.com